Monday, October 31, 2011

Be Still...

I love observing people to see how they are wired. I especially love watching the people close to me and predicting their response and then seeing if it plays out like I thought it would.

Some people make really quick decisions and make them well.

Some people go back and forth, analyzing every option over and over. Then they second guess their decision after they've made it-- even if it turns out well.

I'm both in different situations. Sometimes, I make those quick decisions and sometimes I mull things over, changing my mind back and forth. Sometimes I allow the indecision to stall things past when I have the capability of actually making a choice. Other times, I make a snap decision and it works out well.

Brandon leans more on the quick decisions that are made well. He is drawn to employment positions that require this. He loves fast paced work. And luckily for me, he loves fast paced homelife.. life with four is anything but slow. LOL!

Why am I sharing this you ask?

Well.. in my previous post I asked for you to pray for us as we prayed for direction. Brandon and I both seemed to be getting the same answer.

And honestly both of us having the answer so quickly, made us wonder if we were reacting in fear.

We have the opportunity to commit to one agency for a fee and become an "official" adoptive family for them. The fee is pretty significant to us but we trust this agency and the adoption coordinator. The adoption fees are within our adoption budget. Our homestudy is written far more open than the current adoptive families which means that our adoption profile would be shown often.

And yet we feel like we are being told to "Be Still."

I know, I know.. I scratched my head at that one too and so did Brandon.

I can't tell you how many times I've wondered "Is this fear talking, or You God?" I've asked God this question repeatedly. And yet, Be Still continues to be what we are supposed to be doing.

Honestly, we feel at peace with this decision. We are still eligible to adopt. But for now, we are attempting to listen to the message and savor life with our amazing four children and live in the moments.

Trust me, I know how bizarre this all sounds. When I started my blogging journey it was to document my life -- the good, the bad and the seemingly crazy.

Somehow we do crazy really well.


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